Embrace & let go

A Reflection

2012-01-27T11:58:00.000-05:00

Somehow time got away from me and I never shared what I had hoped to about recording my 1000 gifts this past year after reading Ann Voskamp's One Thousand Gifts.

It was about a six month project, and one that has continued on since I recorded my 1000th item last March.

It truly is remarkable the way that a situation can experience such change by simply focusing on thankfulness- turning thoughts to the Lord and his goodness.

Here are a few thoughts I recorded back around that time...

I think the most unexpected gift I was given through the practice was TIME.

Ann speaks in her book about how we can learn to see time for what it is- a gift, each moment a gift- and that our constant grasping for more of it can in a way be satiated just through thanksgiving.

I have lived this now and know it to be true! I am newly a stay at home mom, and I am so incredibly grateful for the priveledge of being able to be with my children. However, I've been feeling the pulls, the grasping, the feelings of inadequacies and guilt for perhaps not doing enough, not being enough in this quite all-consuming job.

I have been so very blessed the past few months by making time to SEE God, His love and his goodness, in the smallest moments with my son and with my housework... allowing myself to forget about what life "should" look like and just rest in His presence enjoying what He has put right in front of me, embracing each moment. Stunning!

One of the thoughts I appreciated most in her book was regarding the poor, and our ability to still give thanks even when there are the starving and suffering. Kristian and I have feel strongly about the importance of loving these people, and I had been thinking about this very question before I came upon it in chapter three. I almost felt guilty reading a book on gifts and thankfulness when there are so many urgent needs all around me. One of my favorite lines in the book: "Rejecting joy to stand in solidarity with the suffering doesn't rescue the suffering. The converse does..." After reading this I felt such freedom. (And why had I not thought of it before??)

I have absolutely love the habit of thanks that is taking root in my heart. Something wonderful happened the other day. I was trying to do too many things at once and within a moment I dropped a cup of milk, glass shattering, big sigh escaping my lips. As I immediately bent down to clean it up I found my mind racing to find something to be grateful for in it. I thought for a moment as I cleaned and honestly could't feel much thankfulness in the frustrating seconds, but then I realized!... a gift was that my mind was so in the habit of thanks that I was sitting there cleaning spilled milk searching for the gift. What a beautiful thing!

Found in the Living Room

2012-01-22T23:20:00.000-05:00

What happens when an innocent decorative birdcage meets a two year old with flashcards?

I'm liking his creativity.

Weakness

2012-01-20T08:14:00.002-05:00

My sweet sister gave me a very special necklace for Christmas. Next to the tiny "K" charm there is a locket, and inside the locket is a tiny piece of paper folded several times with a tiny green ribbon tying it up.

If you untied the string and unfolded the piece of paper you'd find a verse that runs through my head rather consistently throughout the day:

My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.

2 Corinthians 12:9

I'm not sure if she knew how much I have clung to this verse on my mothering journey so far, but it was the perfect selection for the locket.

I've never done anything else in life where I've experienced such weakness, and such a need for God's grace. I've never silently cried out "Help me!" so many times.

I've been thinking a lot about what it means for his power to be made perfect in my weakness.

And I've decided that I really want to see that. I want to see His power made perfect.

Admitting my weakness and my need for God is a platform for the demonstration of his incredible power.

Even though it can be difficult (as it undoubtedly was for Paul, who wrote these words), it is the best place to be.

Motherhood is a most incredible journey, so all-consuming, so refining, so wonderful, and such a perfect place for God to work in our weakness.

My boys

2012-01-19T15:32:00.000-05:00

Kristian got this a couple days ago at the kitchen table.

Ha- I love Jackson's face.

As of last night, all three of us are sick! Just colds, but still no fun.

But Kristian is working from home today and taking care of us.

I think we'll have an extended movie time when Caedmon wakes up from his nap.... maybe until dinner.

Happy day to you.

Seeing God in Small Moments

2012-01-17T22:12:00.001-05:00

A glimpse from one of our (uneventful yet very full) Colorado mornings....

Thankful.

Happy Friday

2012-01-13T10:06:00.000-05:00

Up early with my cooing little buddy, drinking coffee, listening to instrumental hymns and reading Philippians.

What a happy Friday morning.

Chapter 3 holds a perfect reminder for today: Rejoice in the Lord.
And also in chapter 4: Rejoice in the Lord always, and again I say, Rejoice!

May we remember to rejoice as we go about the normal tasks of the day, the trials, the exciting moments, the low ones. God is good and gracious in the midst of them all.

Everyone Loves a Good "Before and After"....

2012-01-13T07:36:00.000-05:00

As seems to be the case with many couples (us included), my parents' bedroom was low on the list of priorities of things that needed to be decorated or fixed up around their house.

But my sister and I knew they would enjoy a spruce-up so we asked if we could take on a little beautification project. My mom was thrilled.

Here are a few shots of the room before...

(and of course I had to use bad lighting and wait until there were some Christmas-wrapping piles and an unmade bed for dramatic effect...)

Anne and I had a budget of about $250. We took over the room for about 4 hours, and here is the finished product...

...blew up several old black and white pictures of the two of them...

... My dad has a great collection of artifacts in his office so we used a few in the room. The "200" was unearthed during a building project he did in NYC several years back....

...The beautiful old dresser was my mom's dad's...

...My dad's dad collected this piece during WWII...

....the entryway with an antique clock from a few generations back...

...this shelf hangs above a reading chair and side table...

...the pillow covers, blanket, and curtains are all from Ikea....

(the walls are actually white, not the same color as the curtains as this picture appears)

It has a very serene and relaxing feel-- the perfect place for two busy people to end their day.

There were a few things left undone (a rug for the foot of the bed, and a big rustic piece to hang above the bed) but they really loved the finished product. And we had such a blast doing it!

Hope Collection

2012-01-11T17:57:00.000-05:00

It's great to be home! We had an excellent Christmas holiday and I'll try to post some pictures soon.

For now, I just wanted to thank all of you so very much who purchased items from my Etsy shop during November and December. All the profits went straight to Heartline Ministries in Haiti.

The folks who work there are doing amazing things. Several of them have uprooted their families from comfortable lives in the States and are experiencing such ups and downs of life in an incredibly difficult foreign place. But their perseverance and commitment to the Lord's call is inspiring.

Take a few minutes to visit their site and learn more about their work with mothers and babies.

www.heartlineministries.org

THANK YOU!

Sunrise

2011-12-29T22:12:00.000-05:00

Every moment I live, I live bowed to something. And if I don't see God

in the moments, I'll bow to something else.

-Ann Voskamp, One Thousand Gifts

Sunrise this morning.

Colorado!

2011-12-28T20:59:00.000-05:00

The day after an incredible Christmas in Dallas at my parent's home we headed up to meet Kristian's family in glorious Colorado. I'll post more on Christmas later but for now here are a few pics from today's happenings.

Coffee shop breakfast

Playing outside the house in the early morning

Sweet Baby J

Where to find satisfaction regardless of circumstance

2011-12-18T13:37:00.000-05:00

Satisfy us by your loving-kindness in the morning; so we shall rejoice and be glad all the days of our life.

Psalm 90:14

~~~~~~~~~~

Desert Song

2011-12-17T08:47:00.001-05:00

Proclaim with me the greatness of the Lord; let us exalt his name together.

Psalm 34:3

(Sitting by the fire, early morning at my parent's house. Caedmon is getting breakfast out with Bubba (what he calls my dad!) and Jackson is still asleep. Coffee, reading, writing.... so good.)

For your loving-kindness is greater than the heavens, and your faithfulness reaches to the clouds.

Psalm 57:10

Save the weak and the orphan; defend the humble and needy;

rescue the weak and the poor; deliver them from the power of the wicked.

Psalm 82

I was talking with a friend recently and learned of some very difficult circumstances surrounding them.

No doubt someone reading this, or someone you know is in a "desert" season right now, even in the midst of the bustle and cheeriness of the holidays.

As a believer in Christ, "no weapon formed against you shall remain."

Take comfort in the words of this song today.

Christmas Moments

2011-12-13T09:17:00.001-05:00

Christmas Nights

2011-12-09T07:40:00.001-05:00

Creation

2011-12-04T20:29:00.002-05:00

I sing the mighty power of God, that made the mountains rise,

That spread the flowing seas abroad, and built the lofty skies.

I sing the wisdom that ordained the sun to rule the day;

The moon shines full at God’s command, and all the stars obey.

I sing the goodness of the Lord, who filled the earth with food,

Who formed the creatures through the Word, and then pronounced them good.

Lord, how Thy wonders are displayed, where’er I turn my eye,

If I survey the ground I tread, or gaze upon the sky.

There’s not a plant or flower below, but makes Thy glories known,

And clouds arise, and tempests blow, by order from Thy throne;

While all that borrows life from Thee is ever in Thy care;

And everywhere that we can be, Thou, God art present there.

I Sing the Mighty Power of God, by Issac Watts, 1715

(taken from Saturday's Divine Hours reading)

(pictures taken a few weeks ago when Daddy said yes to Caedmon asking to play in the rain)

My Birthday Surprise!

2011-12-03T23:37:00.001-05:00

For my birthday Kristian surprised me with an incredible gift-- a family photo shoot with one of our great friends, Nicole Hager.

She did such a wonderful job of capturing our sweet boys. I love all the interaction that the photos depict between Kristian and the boys because it's so true to life. Kristian is such an incredible dad (and husband) and these little boys are blessed to have him.

Here are some of the pictures she put to music.

Thank you, Nicole! It's such a gift to have these moments captured!

Divine Hours

2011-11-30T06:52:00.001-05:00

With my whole heart I seek you; let me not stray from your commandments. Psalm 119:10

It's 5:30am and I'm sitting by the glowing Christmas tree in the otherwise dark living room.
Everyone else is asleep. I just put a variation of this in the oven and it smells really good.

It's rare to get a moment like this, even at 5:30. One of the boys is usually awake.

I wish we could set up a video camera to capture all that happens here in a course of a night.

Kristian and I always start out in the same bed at the same time but never end up there in the morning. I'm usually in the living room with Jackson, having fallen asleep in a chair after feeding, and Kristian is asleep on a pile of blankets on the floor of Caedmon's room with the little guy cuddled up next to him, or jumping all over him saying "eat! eat! eat!" Lately he's been calling for Daddy about 4:30 or 5am.

One day we will get a full night's sleep, though maybe not for a while. That's ok.

I will offer you a sacrifice and praise your name, O Lord, for it is good. Psalm 54:6

During Advent I'm reading through The Divine Hours prayer book, which gives fixed-hour prayers and scripture for morning, noon, and night. To be honest, I usually only make time for one of these, but I'd love to be in the habit of pausing and reading for all three.

Fixed-hour pray has been used throughout history. The psalms say, "seven times a day do I praise you." We see the Apostles praying at fixed hours as well. (you can find some interesting history on the subject from a quick online search.)

I love the repetition. There is always thanksgiving, and praise, and request for the Lord's presence.

This morning's "Concluding Prayer of the Church"

Dear God, Almighty and Everlasting Father, you have brought me in safety into this new day: Preserve me with your mighty power, that I may not fall into sin, nor be overcome by adversity; and in all I do direct me to the fulfilling of your purpose; through Jesus Christ my Lord. Amen.

Nativity

2011-11-29T11:59:00.001-05:00

Caedmon calls them, "Mommy, Daddy, and Beebee."

Christmas Book Collection

2011-11-28T10:16:00.001-05:00

I think having seasonal books around for respective holidays is a great way to ingrain the meanings and stories in children.

Over the last couple years we've been collecting holiday books for Christmas and Easter, and a few for other smaller holidays. We read them over and over again throughout the holiday.

This is the first Christmas Caedmon is able to "talk" about what we are reading and remember the stories and names when I bring them up later. For about a week now we've been reading stories about baby Jesus, and some other children's traditional Christmas stories.

I think all of these books except one are from the thrift store, less than a dollar each. I just keep them in a box at the base of the Christmas tree. Then he can grab them whenever he likes!

Here are a couple of his favorites:

Christmas Story: A Sparkling Nativity Play

Joy To the World

Christmas Blessings, from the Little Blessings series

And if you have a little older kids, or if you just want to read a great story yourself, try The Best Christmas Pageant Ever, or The Christmas Blessing (I haven't read this one since college, but really enjoyed it then when I read it while living in Florence, Italy. I even just found a train ticket from a weekend trip to Switzerland bookmarking a page!)

I know there must be tons of other great books. I'm excited to continue collecting them through the years!

I'd love to hear if you have any favorites!

2011-11-26T23:57:00.001-05:00

Thanksgiving 2011

2011-11-25T15:44:00.001-05:00

(Easiest bread recipe ever here. I made pizza with the remaining dough tonight.)

Just Life

2011-11-24T22:51:00.001-05:00

A recent series of events has led to an unfortunate outcome....

Caedmon and I have a little thing where I say "Who loves you, Caedmon?"
And he says "Daddy!", or "Mama!", and various other people.

Also recently he was in the presence of one of our friends dressed in the Chick-fil-A cow mascot costume and he has been referring to him as the "Big Moo" ever since.

ALSO recently I've been saying, "Caedmon, how much does mommy love you?" and he says, "BIG!"

Well, the last few weeks he has mistakenly combined the phrases in his head, and now when I ask him, "Who loves you, Caedmon?", he replies "Big Moo Mama!"

I've decided not to be offended.

You know you have a toddler in your house if...

You can't leave your phone around because he knows how to unlock it and find the camera app.

You can't leave your earrings and cup of water next to each other.

You read lots of Dr. Seuss.

You drink pumpkin smoothies on the kitchen floor.

You try to take pictures but they don't really turn out as planned.

(lovely focused shot of a flip-flop and green ball)

Then said toddler takes over the picture-taking.

You dive to the the ground to try and make it in his shot

so he won't insist on trying over and over and over again.

I love my little toddler. He keeps me laughing all day (in between the times I'm trying to think of creative ways to say "No!" so I'm not just saying "No!" all day.)

He enjoys doing push-ups and pull-ups with Daddy, running "fast!" all over the house, playing outside, getting kisses on his boo-boo's, and showing us his muscles.

He has such a sweet heart and we are loving this phase.

More on our little Jackson Justus coming soon.

Just a few days late...

2011-11-24T22:46:00.001-05:00

We had a fun little Halloween.

Caedmon didn't want to wear the spider costume we borrowed from a friend so we just put him in some camo clothes and boots and he was...hmm... a hunter? A soldier? Or maybe just an Oklahoma boy.

We went to a little gathering for families through the law school so I dressed up as a flower. (I'm sure I've said it before here, but I'm kind of a Halloween Scrooge. It's never been my favorite holiday. Now that I have kids it's much more fun, though!) So, that being said, I prefer costumes that don't require me to buy anything, and that could almost pass as normal clothing if need be.

This is Caedmon pre-haircut.

Made this little flower headband using this tutorial.

In the evening we Trick or Treated at our friends' house across the street. They are an older couple and are so sweet to the boys. They had us in for candy and cupcakes and cider. Caedmon just wore his pumpkin pj's.

Sadly I didn't get one single picture of Jackson besides this one on my phone. We made him wear the spider!

Thanksgiving Place Cards from Central Park

2011-11-23T16:39:00.001-05:00

We had several wonderful Thanksgiving celebrations while living in New York City, and I find myself missing it today!

We watched the Macy's Parade a few years right above Harold's Square from Kristian's office, dined at a family-style Italian Restaurant one year, and ate right on the ice of the Rockefeller rink another. Such wonderful memories!

Our Thanksgiving this year will look quite different, but it's our first time to host and I'm excited. Though we are all the way across the country in Oklahoma, there will still be a little bit of the City on our table.

These little place cards are are made with Central Park twigs. I'm sure it's highly illegal to take them from the park, but I acted ignorant and gathered a few one day, along with some bigger sticks to make the valance for Caedmon's nursery.

Who Am I Talking To? (Part 2)

2011-11-21T22:51:00.001-05:00

I stopped here due to my waking babe, so I'll finish up now as I know you've been on the edge of your seat with anticipation....

I love when I read something in scripture, having read it countless times before, and it suddenly takes on a new meaning or sheds light on a situation, or teaches me something striking about God. It is the Living Word, after all.

As I sat there, I started reading Colossians 3 (you may recall I'm trying to memorize it).
Verses 5 and 6 go like this:

Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. On account of these the wrath of God is coming.

That may seem to strike us as harsh sometimes... it's always a little frightening to think of the wrath of God coming!

But then it occurred to me (and again, this is obvious, it just hit me in a new way) that if his wrath is coming because of those things, then he is the opposite of those things. None of those grievances exist in Him.

He is good. So good.

It also struck me that I am all those things, or display aspects of them, yet he loves me still!
He accepts me because of the price Jesus paid on the cross, taking my penalty.

Then I read verse 12 through 14:

Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.

And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.

And his beauty struck me even more. I must put on these things because that's who he is too!
He is holy, compassionate, kind, humble, meek, patient, peaceful, thankful, wise, and loving.

He is the perfect embodiment of them all.

What a beautiful and splendid God I serve!

Who Am I Talking To?

2011-11-16T16:49:00.001-05:00

I've been praying lately (well, this actually seems to always be my prayer) that I would know God more.

To know God more requires spending more time in scripture, and more time in prayer.

These are both areas that I can always grow in, and really desire to, but sometimes let "life" get in the way.

But what is life without my relationship with God? What am I apart from him?

Sometimes I struggle to get my priorities in place.

I was praying the other morning in a moment of what felt like chaos (it had been a rough, long night and my patience was unfortunately wearing thin with my sweet boys) and I suddenly felt frustrated at a feeling of disconnect from God. I felt like I didn't even know how to connect with the one I was talking to, and I was disappointed with myself.

He says ask, seek, and knock and I will find Him. Sometimes I just am too busy and distracted to do those things.

Again, priorities.

This afternoon, nap time was going really smoothly... a true gift! I was working on my Etsy shop orders and thanked God for the few minutes of quiet to get these things done.

Then, I realized that, though I felt like I had a ton to do with no time to pause, the best thing I could use the few moments for was to just spend time with Him. Put down the orders, close the computer, and get out my Bible.

So I did.

And now my baby has awoken, so I must go, and leave this to be continued....

Day 14: To Really Know

2011-11-14T09:37:00.001-05:00

"As we enter this holiday season and you get that urge to do the typical charity/giving (which inherently is NOT bad), take a moment to pray and ask His Spirit what action He is asking of you.

Often it is a prompting and/or reminder of His call to KNOW the poor, the needy, the marginal, the sinner. The temptation is to fix the problem and give quickly, when most of the time, He just wants us to get on our knees, pray, talk, confess, and imitate His Son, Jesus.

To know the poor is to know ourselves and to know our Savior."

A great reminder from my friend, Serenity, who lives a compelling life loving people.

A little sightseeing, Oklahoma style

2011-11-09T23:31:00.000-05:00

One of the many, and I mean many, perks of living in Norman, Oklahoma, is that the famous Route 66 runs just about 30 minutes north of us.

And on this famed route one can find not one, but three, record setting sites within 5 miles of each other.

A couple Sundays ago we ventured out to take a look.

First off, you pass the (second) largest cross in America.

Next, you'll find yourself staring at the largest "pop" bottle in all the land, sitting right outside Pops, a kind of fancy gas station with every soda you could ever, ever imagine.

And last, but certainly not least is America's only true round barn.

Now don't try to say you've seen another round barn, and certainly don't bring a picture of it to the owner of this barn. He'll make a mockery of you by posting it in his gift shop and dispelling your lies.

(clearly folks, it's not round.)

Now, there's rumored to be another true round barn in or around Ardmore, OK.

We're going to need a picture.

I personally found the smattering of international barns interesting....

In the round barn loft...

Auntie and Jackson

Oh the joy of round barns!

Barn kisses

Jackson likes this place

Caedmon liked the huge plastic horse.

Pops was fun, delicious, and everything but nutritious.

Hello largest Pop bottle in America

Hello slathered, fried goodness.

A delightful Sunday jaunt!

Day 13: Orphan Sunday

2011-11-06T23:20:00.003-05:00

Yes, I should have completed my 31 Days a week ago, but who's really counting? I have a few more things I hope to post for the 31 Days so they may show up here and there.

Today is "Orphan Sunday."

Tonight, take a minute to visit the Together for Adoption website and watch a few of the videos posted.

I especially love the first one with the Stewarts, and the last one with Katie Davis from the Kisses from Katie blog I've often talked about.

Enjoy.

The Hope Collection for Heartline

2011-11-02T14:40:00.000-04:00

I'm so excited to share with you the organization where the Etsy shop profits will go.

Heartline Ministries

I'm sure many of you know Heartline. (remember the purses from last year?)

Heartline demonstrates Christ's love in a phenomenal way and works tirelessly in Haiti to serve families.

They believe in fighting the orphan crisis by empowering women with the skills they need to be successful parents. They offer prenatal care, safe births, health education, and child development classes for women.

Please take a second to go visit their website and learn a little more.

I originally became acquainted with Heartline through Heather's blog. She and her family packed up their happy lives in Texas about a year ago and headed to Haiti. Now she and her husband both work at Heartline. You'll be encouraged, disturbed, and inspired by some of the stories she shares. Enjoy!

The Hope Collection

2011-11-02T00:49:00.000-04:00

Friends.
As of today, my Etsy shop, Magnolia Tree House, is stocked with for the holiday season with The Hope Collection.

You were all so generous and supportive a few months ago when we sold stationary, and because of that, three precious children are receiving life-saving surgeries. Wow.

This Christmas we are raising funds for orphans, and maternity and newborn care in an impoverished country, groups so near to my heart. I will tell more about the specifics and the organization shortly, but I wanted to go ahead and post the shop now. All profits from The Hope Collection sales (everything in the shop currently) will go directly to this cause.

So, if you feel inclined, go browse around and see if there's anything that would look nice in your home for the holidays, or as a gift. There will be few more items going up soon. Please don't hesitate to email me if you have any questions.

I so appreciate your generosity and love for these dear ones who will receive the much needed support and HOPE.

Day 12: Write a Thank-You Note

2011-10-28T11:14:00.000-04:00

My husband has really been the most influential in the thank-you writing area of my life.

Even back in high school he was a thank-you writer, which really impressed me. Most guys his age were not.

Kristian back in high school! Found this a few months ago in a box of stuff in my parent's garage.

Since then, he is always the first in our family to write a thank -you note and the one who makes sure they get done. I really appreciate that about him (though I don't always act like it). He even will write me a thank-you and has occasionally mailed it back to me, a true sign of love from my very thrifty man.

Along with this post, I'm taking a few minutes today to finish the baby thank-you's I have yet to complete. (I'm so sorry if you're due one and haven't received it yet!)

Here are a couple thoughts on gift thank-you's (totally my opinions, no proper etiquette researched here):

-Always state what the gift was. (I've received a thank-you or two and thought, "Wow, they have absolutely no idea what I gave them!", and I'm sure someone has received one of those from me!)
-Mention how the gift will be used or enjoyed.
-Express how nice it was to see the friend, either in the past, or at a future time.
-Maybe even give a "gift" back in words: Why are you thankful for them? What makes them a wonderful friend? Why are you compelled by their generosity?

-Repeat the thanks in closing.

Just For Fun:

Here are a couple great tips from Emily Post's website on getting kids excited about writing thank-you notes!

Check out these free printable Thank-You's from Jones Design Company!

http://jonesdesigncompany.com/printables/thank-you-notes-free-download/

Day 11: At the End of the Day

2011-10-25T22:54:00.000-04:00

Some days I find myself wanting to be noticed, wanting to be congratulated on all the work I've done, wishing that someone could catch a glimpse when I'm trying to cook dinner while holding one crying baby with a toddler pulling on my leg and whining for a snack.

I seek affirmation some days from every place except the place it sits readily available. And not available because of what I've done, but because of what Jesus has done for me.

That's why this song resonates with me today, and why it's fitting for this 31 (or 13ish) Day Challenge. I am compelled to love others because of Christ's love for me, and no matter what I do or don't accomplish, I want my heart to look like His heart... at the end of the day I want to have loved well.

Day 10: One of the Best Gifts to Give

2011-10-24T23:19:00.001-04:00

I have the opportunity to bless and serve my family in ways unimaginable through one single gift: Prayer.

Praying for them is one of the ways I can best love them.

Baby Caed last June, Central Park

Over the years I've tried different methods for consistently spending focused time in prayer for my loved ones. I can't say I've done an excellent job in this area. My prayers are usually quick ones throughout the day as thoughts arise.

But I so desire to spend intentional, set-apart time praying for them and for all the many different areas of life that need prayer.

Baby Jackson at about 2 months

For the last year I have used two simple prayer calendars from the Inspired to Action blog, one for my husband and one for my children, and they have been extremely helpful in keeping me on track. I need the reminders in front of my face.

One set is up on the side of my fridge where I can see them from the kitchen sink, one set is taped in the back of my journal, and the calendar for the children is hanging framed in their room over the changing table.

(If you are making anyone's lunches, it's great to have these quick verses/prayers up in the fridge so you can jot a quick note of encouragement on a napkin!)

Here is a link to the Wife's Prayer Calendar

Here is a link to the Mother's Prayer Calendar

For the people in my life I want to pray for besides my husband and children (parents, siblings, in-laws, grandparents, a handful of close friends, and a few other things like neighborhood, city, country, etc.) I keep a weekly schedule in the back of my journal where each person is assigned to a day. It's the best way I've found to stay consistent!

(Wanted to mention that this post is about prayer as a tool for loving and serving others. Prayer is also much more than that and is primarily a way of communing with and loving God!)

Day 9: Two Compelling Artists

2011-10-20T15:19:00.001-04:00

The last few weeks I've really been loving Shaun Groves' newest album, Third World Symphony, and Sara Groves' newest, Invisible Empires. (And the two Groves' have no relation!)

I'm so encouraged when artists use their gifts to serve and bless others, and that's just what these two are doing.

completely unrelated fall pumpkin picture

Shaun is a representative for Compassion International and has been deeply impacted by the plight of much of the third world. He and his family have changed much of their lifestyle to help. Serving in this capacity isn't just a way to check off his 'charity' goal; it's his life.

Check out this site and watch the short video behind the reason for the new album.
And there's a free song download!

If you know me, you know of my love for Sara Groves. She does a lot of work with International Justice Mission. For Sara too, the call to serve the poor and needy seems to be one that has affected her at the level of her identity.

Sara's lyrics are consistently real and thought-provoking, something I so value in music. You can sample all the songs on Invisible Empires here. I love it.

Big brother and me almost exactly one year ago.
Look at those legs.

Coffee Tray

2011-10-19T15:57:00.000-04:00

I've been on the lookout for a little tray for the small corner of counter in my kitchen that holds my coffee pot and other coffee accessories.

I only wanted to pay a few dollars (surprise), so wasn't expecting to find anything too great.

Then I spotted this beauty at a thrift shop.

Look at that hand-carved woodwork!

However, the tile colors were a little 70's for me.

I thought I'd attempt to change them up without buying new ones to replace them.

It was quite easy and didn't take long at all. I just had it sitting on the kitchen table and whenever I had 5 minutes here or there I'd work on it.

1. Taped off the edges

2. Painted over tiles with plain old cream colored acrylic craft paint. (I'm sure this is a no-no in the ceramic tile world, but I was just looking for a quick and easy fix.)

3. Once the paint dried I took a mechanical pencil with no lead and traced the flower design from underneath, revealing the previous design through the paint.

4. I painted on one more layer of the cream, let it dry, and then sparingly (with the pencil) etched the flower design, giving it more of an antiqued look instead of tracing every line.

5. Last, I painted a layer of Modge Podge with a sponge brush over the top to seal the paint and make it (somewhat) water-resistant.

I really like the finished product. It's not perfect, and I'm sure will chip or peal, but for now it's just the unique touch I was hoping for.

I've always loved this thought from Edith Schaeffer (in The Hidden Art of Homemaking) on using creativity to enhance your home:

First of all, be satisfied with the fact that although your art or talent may never be accepted by the world as anything 'great', and may never be your career, it can be used to enrich your day by day life: enrich it for you, and for the people with whom you live.

Secondly, come to a recognition of the fact that it is important for you to be creative in this area to the extent of your talent: important for you as a person who is a creative creature.

Day 8: Connecting With Great-Grandparents

2011-10-18T22:33:00.000-04:00

Sometimes I forget how much my (and Kristian's) grandparents love to be a part of my children's lives. I'm not always great about forging that connection, but am trying to improve.

If you have children, and those children have great grandparents, take this amazing opportunity to connect.

Folks of that generation (and really any generation!) love receiving real paper mail. They'd be absolutely delighted to receive a special note or drawing from their great grandchild.

I know I often let way too much time pass without telling my grandparents how much I love and appreciate them.

So Monday Caedmon made a card for one set of his great grandparents who he doesn't see often with a little drawing, and then today we sent a card to another. We're so blessed to have these people in our lives and should take advantage of every minute!

Family Trip to the Pumpkin Patch

2011-10-18T21:52:00.000-04:00

Day 7: Have a Meal With Someone New

2011-10-12T22:22:00.000-04:00

Have someone in mind you'd like to get to know better? Invite them over to your home for a meal, or out to eat! It always seems to be most natural to chat over food. We had a new friend over for lunch today and had a great time.

For impromptu meals at home I like to keep a few things on hand to make it simple and stress-free. This is especially helpful for guests coming to breakfast or lunch when I won't have a nap time to prepare.

I'd much prefer a homemade pizza, but a frozen Newman's Own thin crust pizza does the trick just fine, and everyone seems to love pizza for lunch. That's what we had today with a plate of sliced apples and tangerines.

Other Fall crowd-pleasers are homemade soups and grilled paninis.

I also always try to have homemade cookie dough in the freezer so I can easily pop a few in the oven for a little treat. (and also so I can eat it all the time)

Of course, it's also fun to just meet for coffee or have someone over for coffee or tea and a baked treat.

If you're looking for something extra special, try this recipe for pumpkin syrup for a homemade pumpkin spice latte. I made it this morning and it is delish!

Sometimes I find inviting someone new into my life a little intimidating or potentially awkward, but it usually always ends up being so rewarding and worthwhile!

Day 6: Just Four Muffins

2011-10-10T20:08:00.000-04:00

The weather is wonderful.
Yesterday was dark and stormy and cozy.
Today, bright and cool.

This time of year always gets me in a baking mood. (Well, let's be honest, really any time of year does.)

Saturday, Caedmon and I made some Pumpkin Apple Walnut muffins. Mmm. It's nice to have a healthy, quick breakfast on hand for the boy who is requesting food from the moment he awakes.

We have some neighbors, an older couple, across the street who are always so kind to us. I want them to know their kindness doesn't go unnoticed.

I'm realizing a little gesture of thanks doesn't have to be elaborate. Feeling overwhelmed by tasks is usually what keeps me from doing them.

All we did was wrap up four muffins, hot from the oven, and took them over.

So easy, and hopefully a treat for them for the next morning's breakfast.

I remember reading about a woman who always froze a single serving of the dinner she prepared for her family each night. Then once a week she would take over all the single serving frozen meals to her elderly neighbor who lived alone, wanting to bless her with the love of Christ.

I love that. It probably cost her no extra money, and really only a little bit of time, but I'm sure it was an immense blessing to her neighbor.

Wouldn't it be great to always just have thoughts of outreach and generosity on your mind? (And I do realize four muffins can hardly be considered generous!)

I'd really love to be better about that!

In case you're interested in giving four muffins to a neighbor, here's the recipe I used. I just added about a cup of chopped apples and half a cup of chopped walnuts.

Day 5: Embracing the Ordinary

2011-10-08T16:11:00.000-04:00

I sat on the little deck out back with Jackson in my lap and watched Caedmon play.

After several attempts, he finally mastered climbing up the little jungle jim set, given to us by a neighbor, and slid down all by himself.

When did he grow up?

Some moments he still is a baby, and others a little boy.

I sat there feeling a little nostalgic and almost tearful as I watched him play. He was so very proud of his climbing accomplishment.

In the blink of an eye he will be grown. I dread it passing too quickly. I know I must embrace these moments with my children now.

One day, Lord willing, I may have the honor of dancing with him at his wedding and I have a feeling these mental photographs will flood my memory and I'll wonder where in the world these days went.

"Mama!," he shouted, shaking me from my thoughts, wanting me to watch his extraordinary sliding skills again. He clapped excitedly as he sat in dirt at the foot of the slide.

My eyes welled up a little and I clapped too.

These small accomplishments are monumental.

Later in the evening I held Jackson on the couch as he slept. I needed to get up, put him down, and get to work around the house, but I just wanted to freeze time. I've seen how quickly all this passes with my first baby. I'm grateful for this second chance to embrace the little moments.

Sometimes the hours in a day seem long and repetitive and filled with mindless, tiresome work, constant training, correcting, redirecting, feeding, and cleaning up messes.

But all the tasks are worthwhile. If done in order to love my Savior, to glorify him, and to serve the family he has given me, they are so worthwhile. He's given me these little souls to tend and I pray I don't miss all the joy that comes with that.

Day 4: A Friend, and a Friday Treat

2011-10-07T22:58:00.000-04:00

I told you this would not actually be 31 days. That's OK though!

Instead of blogging, we've been having a blast with our wonderful friend, Murph. She came all the way from NYC to see us (and maybe her family too).

Murph is a friend who loves well. She's one of those who just jumps right in and becomes part of the family... picks up a crying baby, does the dishes, rubs a toddler's back to get him to sleep, and bakes glorious, glorious treats.

I decided to add Murph into the "Compelled by Love" series because of the great ways she loves those around her.

She is a genuine friend who shows interest in others' interests, takes initiative, and remembers the small things. We were blessed to have her in our home.

Yes, one way Murph shares her love with many of her friends is through baking delectable goodies, and we were the happy recipients yesterday.

She made us two types of scones, recipes straight from the famous Alice's Tea Cup. One was a mixed berry, and the other a cheddar bacon. Oh yum. She knows the way to our hearts.

And as a little treat for you, here is one of the delightful scone recipes. You may want to whip up a batch this weekend!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mixed Berry Scones

Recipe Source: "Alice's Tea Cup : Delectable Recipes for Scones, Cakes, Sandwiches, and More from New York's Most Whimsical Tea Spot" by Haley and Lauren Fox (William Morrow Publishing)

3 cups all-purpose flour
1/3 cup sugar
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
2-1/2 teaspoons baking powder
3/4 teaspoon kosher salt
1-1/2 sticks (3/4 cup) unsalted butter, cut into 1/2-inch pieces
1/2 cup blueberries
1/2 cup raspberries
1/2 cup blackberries
1/4 cup hulled and quartered strawberries
1-1/4 cups buttermilk
1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
1/4 cup heavy cream (for brushing)
1/4 cup sugar (for sprinkling)

Preheat oven to 400 degrees F.

In a large mixing bowl, combine the flour, sugar, baking soda, baking powder and salt.

With clean hands, work the butter into the dry mixture until it is thoroughly incorporated and has the consistency of fine breadcrumbs. Add all the berries and stir well.

Make a well in the center of the dry ingredients, and pour buttermilk and vanilla extract into well. Still using your hands, combine the ingredients until all the dry mixture is wet, but do not knead!

Turn mixture onto a floured surface and gather dough together. Gently pat the dough into a disk 1-1/2 inches thick. Using a 3-1/2 or 3-1/2-inch biscuit cutter, cut out as many scones as you can and lay them on a nonstick baking sheet. Gather remaining dough together lightly to cut out more scones.

Brush the top of each scone liberally with heavy cream and sprinkle with sugar. Bake the scones for about 12 minutes, or until lightly browned.

Yield: 10 to 12 servings

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Day 3: Buy Deodorant

2011-10-04T12:01:00.000-04:00

Yes, you should be Compelled By Love to buy deodorant, and wear it, but that's not what today's challenge is about...

I recently attended a Girl's Night Out type evening that a few friends host every once in a while. It's just a fun time of eating and talking and encouragement in one of their homes. We even did a craft :)

A few days before we were supposed to meet one of the girls who would be attending suggested we think of a way to bless others outside the group, even through what was just a fun little get-together. She called a local center that serves families in need and they said they were in need of deodorant to give out.

So all the women attending the get-together were encouraged to bring at least one deodorant. The day after the gathering, the family center received a big bag full of deodorant to give away to those they serve.

I loved this. It is a luxury that we as women were able to meet and just enjoy a few hours together. But there's no need for it to stop there. We have plenty of resources that I think we should constantly be thinking of ways to use to bless others.

A stick of deodorant is pretty minuscule, and hardly even worth mentioning as a "donation", but the principle is a good one.

At your next gathering with friends or family (Halloween parties, playgroups, church community groups, girl's night out, family reunion, baby shower, wedding shower....), consider thinking a little outside the box!

Call a local center that serves families, a children's home, or a homeless shelter. Ask what they need, and then meet it! It really is so simple, and is a great reminder that our resources are not our own, but given to us to manage wisely and generously.

Day 2: Do Something You've Been Putting Off

2011-10-03T15:00:00.000-04:00

Don't you just hate when you have something hanging over you that you really need to take care of or follow through on but just haven't made time? Maybe something that involves following through with another person?

For me it usually just stems out of laziness or being too self-focused and not making the time to reach out.

Then there's sometimes that awkwardness where you semi avoid seeing the person after too much time has gone by because you know you need to follow through and just feel rude now.

Or maybe that's just me?

I've had one such case recently. Someone I didn't know very well did something very kind for me, and though I had verbally thanked them, I really needed to follow up with a card or little gift.

So enough excuses!

Today the boys and I made time to tie a little card to a Fall candle and walked it over to this kind neighbor's home a few streets away.

Now I can quit ducking down in the car when I drive by her!

Today is the day to put on kindness and love someone well!

Day 1: The Five Minute Rule

2011-10-02T23:19:00.000-04:00

Several years ago, my aunt, who I greatly respect and love, shared with me a little secret of hers that has proven to be a blessing to her family over the years.

It's always stuck with me and I try to implement it in my home, though definitely not always successfully.

It's the Five Minute Rule and it's very simple.

There are four times of day when the rule should be applied:
-First thing in the morning
-Departure for the day
-Return Home
-Bedtime

The idea is to focus on making the first five minutes of these four times a day with each family member (or even roommates!) happy ones....
Greet your husband or wife cheerfully in the morning. Make them feel that you are actually excited to be living this life with them!
Greet your waking children with enthusiastic voices and loving words.

Leading up to anyone's departure from the home in the morning (or your own) work to make those last few minutes pleasant ones-- moments that will bless that person after they leave your presence. Put grudges and petty things behind you and offer a happy departing word or kisses and hugs.

When reuniting with your family in the evening, again show them that there's nowhere you'd rather be than in your home with them. Show excitement. Give hugs. Ask about days.

Same idea at bedtime. Focus on the other people rather than yourself. Offer words of encouragement and blessing.

Think of it: All together this is just about 20 minutes of your entire day, but what a difference those minutes could make in the lives of the people you love. They will be blessed and so will you!

A note here: Don't be fake or contrived. People see right through that. And of course it's not always possible to apply this, but the idea is just to make these "coming and going" moments pleasant ones that bless those in your life.

31 Days: Compelled By Love... Here we go!

2011-10-01T03:52:00.000-04:00

31 Days to step outside my comfort zone.

31 Days to think more about others than myself.

31 Days to actually do the things I always say I want to do, but often don't.

31 Days to make Christ just a little bit more tangible to someone.

31 Days to LOVE.

I'm so excited to join The Nester in her 31 Day challenge. She has hosted these challenges for a few years now and I've enjoyed reading. This year she's challenged others to jump on in.

I don't know exactly when I think I'm going to write up a blog post everyday, but I'm going to commit to trying! (It will likely be more like 25 days...)

Upon reading about her challenge, my first thought was that I'm not an expert on anything- what could I write about?

Then I realized I don't need to be an expert and this challenge could be used as a time of personal goal setting and stretching. I am loved in such a mighty, passionate, beautiful way by the Lord. But unfortunately it's not always that reality that compels me to love and serve others.That's probably why I often neglect to love well in the many opportunities I'm given.

I plan to talk about a variety of things, from writing thank-you notes, to welcoming new neighbors, serving family, and reaching out to people you know you should but find it difficult.

As I write about each topic I will also be attempting to do what I share.

I desire for my children to see me love others well throughout their years at home with me, and to understand more and more that it's all about Christ. I'm excited to take on some of these daily challenges this month alongside my boys.

I assure you, nothing will be novel or super enlightening. This is mainly just to force myself to look beyond ME. I hope to share a few little tips and secrets with you too, things that I find helpful along the way.

Thank you for joining me!

Dish Bliss!

2011-09-29T23:50:00.000-04:00

My husband will probably roll his eyes at this post because, I'll admit it, I'm a little too excited about our new dishes, and he's been hearing a lot about it.

They are everything I've never wanted in a dish:

They are made by Coleman. (yes, as in the camping company)
They are made of tin.
They are blue.

Yep, blue enamelware camping dishes!

It was about time we got a few kid-friendly dishes that wouldn't shatter after being dropped (or thrown) on the floor.

How cute (I thought, at least) to have this house of boys and for them to use camping dishes at the table.

So far, BIG success.

Caedmon loves being a big boy and drinking out of the cup with no lid instead of his sippy cup. Yes, there's liquid everywhere when he's through, but oh well!

I even mixed in a couple cute plastic ones from Target, you know, for a feminine touch.

The set is extremely durable and will last a long time. (I called them "indestructible." Kristian reminded me they could rust.)

Plus, next time we go camping-- we've got our dishes!

His Daddy

2011-09-28T22:28:00.001-04:00

Yesterday, Caedmon saw an ad featuring a shirtless, steroid-filled, grossly muscular wrestler.

He immediately exclaimed, "Daddy!"

Pretty cute. I'm sure his Daddy would be flattered.

Today, Caedmon saw the below flyer that came in the mail and immediately exclaimed, "Daddy!"

I'm beginning to question his discernment (I mean, not yesterday of course).

And I laughed a lot.

I'm not sure if Daddy would be so flattered.

Actually, after looking at that picture for a minute I'm realizing Caedmon is extremely discerning.

Kristian was working on his "Gig 'em Aggies" sign with him all weekend.

What a smart boy we're raising. That is Daddy!

Prayer for Today

2011-09-28T10:11:00.001-04:00

One thing have I asked of the LORD,

that will I seek after:

that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life,

to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD

and to inquire in his temple.

Psalm 27

Cape Cod beach, 2008 New England road trip

Working on it

2011-09-26T09:18:00.000-04:00

As I work to memorize Colossians 3:12-17, the words are so wonderful for me to read and write over and over again.

A reminder I particularly loved this morning was about forgiveness. There are no excuses or justifications- I can always forgive because, while I was still a sinner, Christ died for me, offering forgiveness.

And the multiple be thankful's are needed daily. I've realized so much over the past year how thankfulness is such a key part of life in Christ.

Around Our House

2011-09-25T23:22:00.000-04:00

Listening to today...
These lyrics are so simple but so powerful.
(no need to watch, just click play and go about your day)
Natalie Grant- "Your Great Name"

Listening and dancing to today...
Sesame Street and Jason Mraz- "Outdoors"

Pumpkins and Colossians

2011-09-21T14:42:00.002-04:00

We went to "visit the farmers" today (the farmer's market) and a kind farmer man gave Caedmon a little orange pumpkin, which has of course been his greatest treasure ever since.

The fall weather here is wonderful and I'm so excited to have more time outside during the days with the boys over the next months.

As a point of accountability I'm posting here my goal to memorize this little passage from Colossians over the next few weeks. I want it to be ingrained in my mind. Now that you know I'll be less likely to put it off. Here goes!

Colossians 3:12-17

¹²Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, ¹³ bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. ¹⁴And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. ¹⁵And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. ¹⁶Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. ¹⁷And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

A happy memory

2011-09-19T22:50:00.000-04:00

Last weekend Kristian and Jackson and I were able to spend a couple days in Denver for some school/work related events.

It was heavenly. We spent two mornings in this delightful coffee shop. I could go there every day.

Loving the memory attached with this picture... scone, coffee, journal and some enlightening time in scripture, scarf weather, and baby Jackson asleep in the carrier strapped onto me.

And a shot from our drive up into the breathtaking mountains for an afternoon in Winter Park.... Jackson happily sleeping on his Daddy.

Fall Wreath

2011-09-16T23:05:00.001-04:00

2011 Wreath Challenge

Spend $0 (use all materials I already have in the house)

Spend less than 30 minutes

Create a cheery little greeting at our front door for each season

~~~~~~~~~~

These boys are keeping me busy and I haven't had much time for decor type activities lately. But that's ok. My children are a little more important than my wreath.

I still stuck with the $0 goal. That's actually one of the reasons this took me so long... I couldn't find anything around my house that was quick and easy and fall-ish! I almost caved and bought some ribbon, but in the end nothing was purchased.

Though I just threw together pieces at different times over the last few days, I think it still took about 30 minutes. I sewed the little pennant ribbon together one afternoon, but already had my sewing machine out so it only took a couple minutes. As you can see, I didn't even remove the black thread that was already in the machine from the other project I was working on.

Well, since I literally fell asleep four times while typing this short post, I better be heading to bed. We aren't quite sleeping through the night yet :)

One Month With Jackson

2011-09-03T23:09:00.000-04:00

Our sweet boy is one month old and we are thankful to have had one month with him. May the Lord give us many more!

As I knew would be the case, I haven't taken near as many newborn pictures of Jackson as I did of Caedmon, but I hope to get some more soon.

Here's a little comparison of the boys, both at about 2 weeks of age....

Jackson

Caedmon

Didn't pose this-- just found Jackson sleeping the exact same way Caedmon used to...

Jackson

Caedmon

Love my little boys.

Birthday Love

2011-09-02T15:55:00.000-04:00

Isn't receiving letters or packages by mail just the best?

I think so.

Seeing your name hand-written on an envelope is pretty special, signaling something other than bills or junk mail has arrived.

Imagine how thrilled I was to find a box with my name on it all the way from our beloved New York City, wrapped in pretty brown paper.

And imagine how even more thrilled I was to open the box and find homemade cookie popsicles (is that what cookies on sticks are called?) from Murph!

Whatta friend.

Caed was really happy too, and wasn't into sharing.

Then I told him he'd had enough and put the remnants of a cookie on the kitchen table.

Then a few minutes later I found this naughty little boy hiding behind our bed, cookie in hand.

I couldn't help but laugh, though.

Thank you so much, Murph!

~~~~~

And thank you to everyone else who made my day so very special with calls and emails and facebook messages.

My sister and parents came up from Dallas to celebrate, which was so kind.

Anne made me chocolate raspberry brownies one night.

Then my parents brought me an ice cream cake the next.

We've been eatin' good around here!

I just love birthdays.

A Friday Treat for Me, and You!

2011-09-02T15:14:00.000-04:00

I have some wonderful friends.

For my birthday one of them, who lives in a land far, far away, had the ingredients for a delicious treat sent to my home and sent Kristian the recipe to make it for me. Is that a thoughtful friend or what?

So here is my Friday treat today, friends. And in honor of it being Friday Treat Day, I'm passing the treat on to you.

These little goodies are ones I've made before but it had been a long time. I'm so thankful she reminded me of their goodness. I love them, and think you will too. (I don't typically do recipes on this blog, though I cook all the time so maybe I'll start. Thought this one was worth it!)

They are originally from this site.

~~~~~~~~~

Raw Chocolate Macaroons

3 cups dried unsweetened coconut flakes

1 1/2 cups cocoa powder

(you don’t have to use exactly this much, just however rich you want them to be. You can even use 3/4 cups cocoa and be fine.)

1 cup raw honey or maple syrup

1/3 cup coconut oil

1-2 tbs. raw peanut butter (if desired)

1 tbs vanilla extract
1/2 tsp sea salt

Mix together. Wet your hands so they don’t stick to your hands, and then form into balls. Put them in the freezer until hardened, at least 30 minutes. MMMM! Some of us think these taste like frozen Bon Bons!
~~~~~~~~

I definitely keep mine in the freezer and pull one or two (or five) out throughout the day for a delicious and healthy treat. (also, your ingredients don't have to be raw.)

And I know the above picture is so lovely and calm, but in an effort to keep things real I'll show what it looked like from another angle.
Piles of mess.
But a Friday treat nonetheless!

Day 4- It's Almost Friday!

2011-08-25T17:12:00.000-04:00

Date:
Thursday, 8/25/2011

Alarm set for:
6am, but I turned it off at 5:33 when both babes were up crying and it didn't look like that extra 30 minutes was going to be happening. However, Kristian went in and laid down with Caedmon, Jackson fell back to sleep, and we all slept until 7!

Highs & Successes:
-Dancing with Caed in the living room. He does a really awesome chicken dance.
-Tickling same boy on the big comfy mat in his room.

-Nicole came back today to eat lunch with us. We love visitors!
-Started jotting down "thanks" in my journal at 5:30 while getting the coffee going. It was still very dark.

- Got about 20 minutes of sleep in the living room (and a few minutes to blog) while both boys napped. Bliss!

-Jackson slept in his bassinet for over two hours this morning. He has preferred being held during the day- always, which I adore, but I also had to get some packing done because...

-We are going to attempt a last-minute trip to Dallas this weekend! I'm sure I'll have my fair share of stories about the two three-hour car rides, and all the ways this will mess up the sleep rhythms we're settling into, but oh well. We leave tonight!

- In an attempt to will Fall into being I added cinnamon to the coffee grounds this morning, which I did all last Fall. It's so delicious.

- Speaking of coffee, my friend emailed and said I should consider investing in one of these. Love it, and love you, Murph!

Lows & Fails:
-Um, this...

-Big brother continues to throw his unwanted food off his tray and onto the floor every single meal. We have employed all sorts of discipline measures and encouragement and reasoning, and he persists. I was reminded in a parenting book recently that it's child-training, often times long and slow, and you won't always see immediate results. I'm needing some results soon though. Or a new dust buster.

-I was reminded why I hardly ever talk on the phone. I had three failed attempts with two of my close friends and my sister today. Things were pretty calm and then the second I got on the phone both children, three times, started either screaming or crying or throwing food or spilling milk. Yikes. I will call you all back soon. Or maybe email.

-We've managed to loose all cup lids except one so I have three drink choices up on the counter and switch the lid accordingly. (Maybe this is a success?)

-And finally, I was really feeling proud of myself for getting out the vacuum and starting on the living room until I realized that all food and dust particles were entering the machine and then flying back at my legs and onto the floor in a trail behind me. A reminder that we are out of vacuum bags. Duly noted.

Read today:
Psalm 25 and Proverbs 25

Listening to:
"Shane and Shane" Pandora station, and Christa Wells' new EP.

Memorable moment:
Peeking around the corner of the kitchen into the living room and catching a glimpse of brotherly love/intimidation as Caedmon showed Jackson his "strong man" flexed arm muscles and fists.

Day 3

2011-08-24T23:46:00.001-04:00

Date:
Wednesday, 8/24/2011

Alarm clock set:
I don't really remember. I think I turned it off sometime around 4:30am when I was half awake feeding Jackson. Then Kristian woke me up around 7 (got to sleep in!) saying he had Caed up and eating breakfast but he had to start getting ready. Time for me to get going!

On my mind:
These days won't last forever-- Enjoy them!
What would my parenting (and life) look life if I looked more like Jesus?

Highs & Successes:
- We had an 8:45am doctor's appt for Caed... and we made it! My goal was to leave the house 30 minutes before the appt. Our doctor is located about 4 minutes from our house, right on campus. But I had a feeling it would take us 30 minutes door to door, and sure enough we walked in exactly at 8:45am.
- A happy visit to our friends' house after the doctor... We love hanging out with Natalie and Hudson. The boys thought it was really funny to tickle each other today. And I drank a full cup of coffee there without even reheating.
- Natalie has a legit bounce house... in her house. Every kid's dream. It's awesome. The boys had a blast. Caedmon was timid at first but by the end he was doing nose dives out the opening and onto the floor.

-This sweet little guy slept in the wrap the whole playdate. And he does this silly face a lot and makes me laugh.

- This little feller was brought to me by my eldest to keep me company while I fed my youngest. I considered it a lovely gift.

- Flashlight fun in the living room

- He totally picked up this magazine all on his own and got up in the chair at the doctor's office. How did he know waiting room etiquette??

- Little brother loves cuddling. (and therefore does NOT like being put down.)

-My good friend, Nicole, came to spend the afternoon with us and even brought her camera to take a few pictures of Jackson. She's a pro. And she's wonderful.

Lows & Fails:
- While quickly trying to get ready in the bathroom this morning I looked down at Caedmon who was playing at my feet and he had a bar of soap sticking out of his mouth. At the same moment I was exclaiming for him to remove the soap he was realizing that soap does not taste good. I guess as long as he had it in there I should have made it a teaching moment and scolded him for all the bad words he says, but since he doesn't really talk yet...
-Diaper leakage on big brother on way into doctor's office. No change of clothes.
-Big brother repeatedly yelling "Mo!" ("more") at our kind hostess this morning to receive more snacks. His manners may need a little refining.
-Apparently Jackson doesn't really like laying in wooden bowls or sitting in wicker baskets so he wasn't very cooperative for Nicole and me.

End of the day ponderings:
-I had about 45 minutes of "free time" this evening from the time Jackson finally fell asleep a bit ago and my intended bed time of 10:30. I wrote this blog post which means the kitchen is still dirty and the living room still wrecked. But they will still be there to happily greet me in the morning, so no worries.
-It's been a long and tiring, but really wonderful day.

Day 2

2011-08-23T22:37:00.004-04:00

A little mobile I made a while back for the nursery.
Maybe I'll get around to posting more pics later.

Date:
Tuesday, 8/23/2001

Alarm clock set:
6am (But I was able to pull both babies back into bed with me and sleep until 7. This has never happened. I was in blissful shock.)

Words that kept me going:
I choose thankfulness.
Patience.
Learn to change my expectations.

Highs & Successes:
-Animal crackers dipped in Nutella (for me)
-Coffee finished (even though it was at 3pm)
-A delicious salmon cake lunch made by my talented sister leftover from her visit
-My gracious friend, Shannon, left banana bread on our porch
-An hour and a half of both boys sleeping! I had time to eat lunch, fold all the laundry, and even respond to a few emails.
-We got out in the car for the first time today! Went to a new natural grocery store in town. I'll definitely be returning. I wore Jackson in the Moby wrap and Caed rode in the cart. Worked wonderfully, besides a couple cries here and there.

-Both boys wore pants to the store

-Made our bed, even if it was at 4:30pm

Lows & Fails:

-Was looking at my phone a few too many times while Caedmon was trying to get my attention. Hate that. I've tried to stop things like Facebook during the day completely now. The dinosaur my son is wanting to show me is much more important than a breaking news story, and maybe a little more important than what my junior high friend is eating for lunch.

-Naptime was rough (until they both conked). Caedmon was not in the mood to sleep but after 2 hours of me going in and out of his room he finally caved.

-Caed stayed in a wet diaper way too long

-Leaky milk cup = spots all over couch

-Once again, a little more Sesame Street than usual

Melt my heart moment:
Both asleep sitting on the couch after I brought them in from the car...

I guess the grocery trip was more exhausting than I realized.

Day 1

2011-08-23T00:00:00.000-04:00

Date:
Monday, 8/22/11

Alarm clock set:
5:50am

Goal:
Survive our first day together, and try to have fun while we're at it. (Due to all the incredible help from our incredible family, this is the first full day I've had with both the boys and nobody else.)

Fears:
What will Baby C do while I feed Baby J?
What will Baby J do while I put Baby C down for a nap?
How in the world is this supposed to work?

Words that kept me going:
I choose thankfulness. I choose to look at these small happenings through the day and thank God.

Confession:
Looked at the clock at 7am while changing Baby C's diaper and told myself it was just 12 hours until bedtime.

Highs & Successes:
-Drank my whole cup of coffee, only reheating it 4 times
-Grabbed Caed's ankle just in time to halt his head-first plummet from my bed an inch above the hard wood floor
-Nobody starved
-I got out of my pajamas
-Caedmon was an angel all day, especially during Jackson's feedings. Can't even count how many times I told him I was so proud of him.
-We all were asleep at one point
-Took a walk in the early morning
-My sweet friend Natalie brought me lunch and provided conversation with another adult for a whole hour!
-Played with water and a paintbrush and foam shapes with Caed on the front porch. He loved it.

Lows & Fails:
-Made a cup of tea at 3pm. Reheated and attempted to drink about 11 times until finally throwing it out at 10pm.
-Baby J lay crying in his own small puddle while I put Baby C down for his nap.
-Baby J cried through last half of walk from the extreme heat
-Though he didn't starve, I think Caedmon only ate bread, french fries, and crackers today. Oops.
-Turned on Elmo a little longer than normal
-Never actually got any pants on Caedmon.... or Jackson, come to think of it.

Thoughts at the end of the day:
So grateful.
I was quite nervous about this day, and it really could not have gone better.
Embracing thankfulness and praising God for the small everyday things is glorifying to Him, and life-giving to me.
I know everyday won't be this smooth, but I sure am thankful for the ones that are.

We will see how tomorrow goes!
(Might try to document this whole week just for the fun of it!)

Our 6th Anniversary!

2011-08-21T19:37:00.000-04:00

It was a day filled with romance, flowers....
music, love notes...
walks on the beach, a fancy dinner....

and firetrucks, or course.

It was actually none of the above, except the firetruck. And I'd even say that despite the reality of the day, there was romance as well.

We woke at about 6am to our crying newborn who's sleeping in our room. We both jump up and start working together to change his explosive diaper-- stripping him down, grabbing wipes and new clothes and diapers and such in our still-dark room.

In the midst of it all, Kristian, leaning over the dirty baby and working patiently says,"Hey babe, Happy Anniversary."

I laugh and think how sweet it is that he actually remembered in the midst of this episode. And I felt very thankful for the first few moments together on our 6th Anniversary... just real life.

Then he tells me to get back in bed and try to sleep a little more (Grammy was staying for the weekend helping with Caedmon as I continued to recover. Amazing!)
He says he wants to bring me breakfast in bed and asks what I'd like.
I choose a donut. We have found the most incredible donuts nearby and I admit I wake up on Saturday mornings (and other mornings) with nothing else on my mind.

He says he will be back shortly with my request and I fall back to sleep with baby.

I wake up a couple hours later with no breakfast, but a message on my phone from Kristian saying the car battery had almost died and he had to run it by the shop. This turned into a big ordeal and another shop and poor Kristian was very sorry for not having my donut to me, but was trying to get the car situation taken care of quickly so we'd have it operational by Monday. I felt bad for him, and couldn't care less about the donut.

He returned after a while but was still left with several things to do on the car himself.
He was in the driveway working on it, Caedmon and Grammy were playing in the front yard, and I was inside feeding Jackson when Kristian comes rushing in the door and into the kitchen, throwing his hand under the cold sink water. He'd been shocked by the car battery and burned his hand badly.

He was in a lot of pain so I called our nurses hotline at the hospital to ask what might be best to alleviate it. She asked me all sorts of questions and proceeded to tell us we must call 911 immediately because Kristian might have a heart attack any moment from the electric shock.

Better safe than sorry, so we called even though he felt fine besides his burned finger.

Within a few minutes, and much to Caedmon's delight, a big red fire truck comes racing down our street with all the lights and sirens. Four guys with lots of gear come bursting in the house and ask who has been shocked.

Kristian kind of laughs and says it was him and that he feels fine but they check his vital signs just to be sure.

Very thankfully, he did not have a heart attack on our sixth anniversary. The rest of the day was filled with babies and diapers and chores and errands, but ended delightfully with a Thai dinner out together (and with Jackson but he slept the whole time), and was topped off with a shared ice cream from Maggie Moo's.

I felt overwhelmingly grateful all day to just be living life alongside Kristian. It's such a blessing, and a blast, to be his wife. I'm incredibly thankful for the past six years.

Happy Birthday to My Beautiful Wife

2011-08-18T11:26:00.008-04:00

To commemorate the 28th anniversary of my bride entering the world, I am going to briefly hijack this blog to share a few thoughts about her. Many of you who read this will already know these things, but as I reflect on God's grace in her life today, I think they bear repeating.

Katy is generous with her love. Constantly seeking to serve and encourage others, she is a continual reminder of the abiding love of Christ.
Katy is humble in conflict. Slow to speak harshly, and quick to repent, she is a continual reminder of our abiding forgiveness in Christ.
Katy is beautiful. Outwardly captivating and inwardly alluring, she is a continual reminder of the all-surpassing grandeur of God.
Katy is creative. Artistically adroit and musically rapturous, she is a continual reminder of the brilliance of our Creator.
Katy is exemplary in parenting. Ever-patient and expressively enthusiastic, she is a continual reminder of the perfect pleasure the Father receives from his children's' joy.
Katy is uncompromising in her character. With consistent integrity and vigilant goodness, she is a continual reminder of the perfect righteousness of our King.
Katy is extravagant with her baking. Whether producing cookies, cakes, or cobblers, she is a constant reminder of my pitiful lack of self-control (I've been known to eat a full dozen hot cookies from the cooling rack before the next batch is even out of the oven - but just once). She is also a continual reminder of the richness of the Gospel fare.

Katy is a trophy of grace, and the fact that she loves a pitiful wretch like me so faithfully is a divine testimony to the redemptive power of the cross and the reality of the reconciling Gospel of Jesus. I am immensely thankful for her today - the 28th anniversary of her first breath.

Katy, thank you for daily leading me to worship our God. May he carry us in faith, hope, and love with every breath we take together, for as long as we both shall live.

Your adoring husband,
Kristian

Stepping Heavenward

2011-08-15T21:54:00.000-04:00

Over the last three days while feeding Jackson I've listened to an audio recording to Stepping Heavenward by Elizabeth Prentiss.

I've wanted to read this for a while but hadn't found time and then saw it online the other day. The free download is available here.

I highly recommend it.

It's a story about sanctification in struggles and suffering, and finding the beauty of Christ in everyday life, no matter what the circumstance.

Such an encouragement for me right now.

Hope you're able to enjoy it as well!

Happy Birthday Lauren!

2011-08-10T11:05:00.000-04:00

Recent baby shower: Lauren, me, Natalie... friends since early elementary

Happy Birthday to a most wonderful and faithful, life-long friend.

How blessed I've been to have her right by my side since kindergarten.

She's the type who encourages, speaks truthfully, and shares in my love for laughter.

She's a beautiful treasure of a friend!

Nostalgic Travel Moment

2011-08-09T11:51:00.000-04:00

Edelweiss, Edelweiss

Every morning you greet me

Small and white clean and bright

You look happy to meet me

Blossom of snow may you bloom and grow

Bloom and grow forever

Edelweiss,Edelweiss

Bless my homeland forever.

One of my favorite movies of all time is Sound of Music. I will never tire of it. Many years ago when my family was in Austria we were able to visit several of the sites where the movie was shot and learn some about the actual von Trapp family. I even made it home with a small package of Edelweiss seeds.

The simple little song by Rogers and Hammerstein just played on the Pandora lullaby station I have playing as Jackson and I rest. Takes me back to the breathtaking Austrian mountains.

Jackson's Birthday

2011-08-08T23:43:00.000-04:00

Even though it came 10 days late, a naturally occurring labor was so exciting for us since I had to be induced last time resulting in a really rough experience.

I labored most of the day at home with Kristian by my side and my mom, dad, and Anne watching Caedmon and taking care of things around the house.

We finally went in to the hospital around 4pm and things really starting ramping up quickly. It was intense and extremely painful, but we were working hard through it.

Once again, Kristian was the most incredible coach anyone could hope for.

We didn't have a doula this time around but we did have Anne there for support and to help Kristian as needed. She was invaluable and I'm so thankful she could share that with us (and I hope she's not traumatized for life!)

Everything seemed to be on track and the whole pregnancy Jackson had been in a great position. My midwife thought I would be ready to push any minute and was surprised when things seemed to be stalling, and a little surprised at the agony I was experiencing.

They did a final check and found Jackson had basically arched his neck back and his head was stuck in an incorrect position... and the doctor who was rushed in said he was only coming out by Csection.

Within minutes they had me ready for the operating room and were sticking the epidural in my back. I have to say at this point I was extremely thankful for the relief and really didn't care that they were cutting open my belly. From that point on everything was quite surreal and dreamlike.

Kristian was suited up and sitting next to me, holding my hand that was shaking uncontrollably from the meds. I heard a little cry come from the other side of the curtain draped across my body and was overwhelmed with thankfulness.

Jackson was a bit bruised and scraped from his difficult decent attempt, and very swollen, but he was healthy and safely in our arms.

The surprise Csection obviously brought with it a lot we weren't expecting as far as recovery goes. But our families have been AMAZING in helping. I think my mom is going on her fourth week here.

The most difficult part of it all has been not being able to be with Caedmon much. I'm in bed a lot of the day, unable to drive or lift anything heavier than Jackson, so others have been attending to all Caed's needs. It's been hard on both of us (though he has loved the time with his grandparents, Auntie, and Daddy!). But as a sweet friend reminded me, this too shall pass!

Even at his young age he has been so sweet with his brother, constantly saying "Beebee" and wanting to kiss his forehead or tickle his feet. Sweet boy.

This unexpected down-time has provided a welcomed opportunity to think and pray and read and I already sense new things God wants to teach me.

Thank you so very much to all you wonderful friends and family who have called, messaged, sent cards visited, offered help, sent flowers, and are bringing food. The Lord is providing greatly for our needs through you all.

Jackson Justus Rose

2011-08-07T19:38:00.000-04:00

We are incredibly delighted to announce the birth of our son,

Jackson Justus Rose.

He came August 2, at 10:46 pm, and is doing wonderfully.

Jackson is a Scottish name meaning God has been gracious, or God has shown favor.

Justus means Just or Upright and comes from the Biblical character in Acts.

God certainly has been gracious in entrusting this baby boy to us, and we pray he grows to

"act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly" with God. (Micah 6:8)

More to come.

For now we are spending much time resting and acclimating to life with two little boys!

Waiting

2011-07-27T23:29:00.000-04:00

“Being in a hurry. Getting to the next thing without fully entering the thing in front of me. I cannot think of a single advantage I’ve ever gained from being in a hurry. But a thousand broken and missed things, tens of thousands, lie in the wake of all the rushing…. Through all that haste I thought I was making up time. It turns out I was throwing it away.”

-Ann Voskamp

1000 Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are

(reminded of this great quote on Sally Clarkson's blog)

Our due date has come and gone and we are still waiting on this little boy to make his appearance. I'm finding myself feeling anxious and just looking forward to holding him and having him home, but also trying to remind myself to make the most of these last days with just Caedmon. I don't think I'm doing a great job, but I'm trying... when I remember.

Here's most likely our last family of three picture, shot this past weekend by my dad.

I am LOVING having my mom and sister here (and dad for several days here and there). They have cleaned my house from top to bottom, played with Caedmon, cooked and baked, provided constant fun and conversation, and I don't think I've touched the dishes in two weeks. Their departure will be a bit difficult, to say the least.

We are just waiting now!

Speaking of waiting, I loved this post on patience yesterday on the Holy Experience blog.

This made me laugh today...

2011-07-19T23:15:00.000-04:00

(After a week staying with us, my sister Anne thought this entirely appropriate to pass along to me.)

Friday Laundry

2011-07-15T15:21:00.000-04:00

"Wherever you are, be all there!

Live to the hilt every situation you believe to be the will of God."

-Jim Elliot

Anne is here and I'm overjoyed. We share many commonalities like coffee and chocolate and down-time and Caedmon.

She took him away today for a few hours to play at the library while I prepped for baby a bit.
Making lists, packing our hospital bag, washing little blue clothes.

This is an exciting time. I can't wait to meet our baby boy.

Birth Announcement (better late than never?)

2011-07-14T22:55:00.000-04:00

This is kind of a sad post.

These are Caedmon's birth announcements.

And it wouldn't be sad at all if it weren't for the fact that these announcements are still here in a box in my desk. Unsent.

Sad.

I wanted to hand-make the announcement and got to work on them finally when he was about 5 months. Then we were wrapped up in the crazy whirlwind of moving when he was about 6 months and they never made it to the mailbox.

Then they stayed packed up in a box once we arrived to the lovely land of Oklahoma and there they sat for a very long time.

So, seeing as a new Rose baby will be born in the next few days and a new announcement will (or might) be created, I decided it's just time to go ahead and "announce" poor Caedmon's birth here, and let it rest.

Giveaway Winner!

2011-07-08T15:59:00.000-04:00

Congratulations to Emily Liddell!

Thank you so much for supporting us, Emily!
So fun to reconnect with you after so many years.

Giveaway Details

I'll ship to your Etsy address next week unless you let me know otherwise!

A Little 'Thank You' Giveaway for Heart Surgery Supporters!

2011-07-07T16:18:00.000-04:00

The theme: Summer Favorites!

...Just a few things that I love and I hope you will too!

(Yes, it's rather girly, but with the exception of one or two it was all females who purchased.)

The details:

1. Handmade "New Every Morning" print in antiqued frame (8x10)

This is a quote (from this verse) that I have by my coffee pot and love the morning reminder.

2. Luggage Tags (set of 2)

And I'm happy to personalize with the winner's name, but won't unless specified.

3. Chalkstalk Tags (set of 5) plus box of chalk

So fun for labeling everything from household storage to gifts.

4. Starbucks Gift Card ($15)

Perfect for a few cold beverages.

5. Spool of Natural Jute

I use this stuff for everything- cute and handy!

6. Lemon Drops

I love these old fashioned candies, especially in the summer. They're pretty in a little glass jar in the kitchen!

..............................

I just can't reiterate enough how thankful we are for all the support you've shown by purchasing stationary or donating towards our heart surgery fund for three precious Iraqi children. I'm so excited to be able to one day tell this baby boy of ours about all the friends and family who celebrated his birth day by giving to this cause. You all have blown us away!

I wish I could make a 'thank you' package for each and every one of you, but I suppose that would defeat the purpose of raising the money.

Every person who purchased a stationary set or donated online will be automatically entered in this random drawing. I hope to have the winner posted by tomorrow evening!

If you prefer your name not be entered in this drawing please email and let me know by Friday, July 8th, at noon. mary.kathryn.rose(at)gmail(dot)com

Thank you, again, from the whole Rose family!

You have been a blessing to us.

Fourth of July Belly and Baby

2011-07-05T15:26:00.000-04:00

What To Do On A Hot Summer Evening

2011-07-03T21:08:00.000-04:00

Always good words to return to

2011-07-02T14:22:00.000-04:00

Love is patient and kind;

love does not envy or boast;

it is not arrogant or rude.

It does not insist on its own way;

it is not irritable or resentful;

it does not rejoice at wrongdoing,

but rejoices with the truth.

Love bears all things,

believes all things,

hopes all things,

endures all things.

1 Corinthians 13

What We Do

2011-07-01T17:34:00.000-04:00

Here are a couple little snapshots of our days. I find Caed seems to thrive more when there are activities and new points of stimulation, so I'm always searching for new ideas. (Email me if you have any!)

We spend lots of time reading during our down time at home, and have checked out every board book our library has to offer multiple times. Now we visit a thrift store I found with a great children's book section for 99 cents each and buy several every month.

Video chats with Annie, who he calls "Ahhng"

Lots of park time, and finding secret passage ways under picnic tables

Making colored rice to shake and run fingers through.
This site has been so helpful for creating fun, cheap, educational activities!

Reading on big pallets during rainy days, staring out the glass door and talking about all we see and hear, and most importantly, eating snacks.

'Gardening' and watering the plants

And...... Lots of eating, pool time most afternoons with friends to beat the summer heat, baby story time at the public library and a visit to the Farmer's Market on Wednesdays, walks on campus, tent-making, weekly bible study time with small group of girls and kiddos from church, grocery shopping, and an increasing amount of Baby Einstein video clips on YouTube as mama's belly increases in size.

Giving "Pup" a bath the other day! Very intriguing for this little guy.

Of course, these are the fun moments. Blogging (like most social media) can be unfair in that regard sometimes and we have the ability to paint our lives as perfect little pictures. Be not deceived! We have our fair share of temper tantrums and off moments. And there are plenty of afternoons when I'm looking at the clock at 4 wondering what in the world we can do for two more hours to keep things interesting before Kristian gets home!

But for the most part our days are full and happy and there's nowhere else in the world I'd rather be. I'm trying my hardest not to allow these times to slip by without recognizing the gift that they are. They will be gone before I know it and I'll miss them dearly.

To reach the point of giving up

2011-06-29T23:08:00.000-04:00

The Lord is my strength and my shield;

in him my heart trusts and I am helped;

my heart exults and with my song I give thanks to him.

Psalm 28:9

I find myself clinging to this bit of encouragement and others like it these days when life seems to be moving a million miles an hour and the prospect of things slowing down is not likely! At night I fall into bed exhausted and weary, wondering how I might possibly make it through the next day and be the type of mother Caedmon needs. Mothers or not, I'm sure many can relate to the weariness!

It's only when I realize that I absolutely can not be my best on my own, that peace and strength come. I'm so weak apart from the Lord. And there's no way I can be the wife and mom I'm called to be without Him.

I heard a song the other day with just the right lyrics for me at the moment.

Maybe that's the point
To reach the point of giving up
Cause when I'm finally
Finally at rock bottom
Well, that's when I start looking up
And reaching out

I know I'm not strong enough to be
Everything that I'm supposed to be
I give up
I'm not stong enough
Hands of mercy won't you cover me
Lord right now I'm asking you to be
Strong enough
Strong enough For the both of us

Despite the work and trying moments, life lately has been full of countless gifts as well.

Some of the more enjoyable happenings have included two incredibly thoughtful and generous baby showers, my mom here helping out for several days, weekly time spent with great friends finding fun little ways to spend our time around town and not die from the heat, other wonderful friends up from Dallas for a quick trip, and Kristian's mom over to stay with Caedmon while Kristian and I spent our very first night away from that little boy to attend an office party a few hours away.

And not just any office party... a costume party! Oh yes, a 'Madmen' theme party. I was wondering how that would work, being over eight months pregnant, but we had a great time. Of course the best part was 24 hours away with my husband. I was in heaven.

Our attempts at a couple pics. Didn't have time for any more!

Assuming our little babe doesn't arrive in the next week or two (we are about 3 weeks from the due date), I have a few other blog posts I hope to accomplish, including a little give-away as thanks for all you who contributed to our heart surgery fund, and some reflections after completing a list of 1000 gifts!

Final thought from our kitchen chalkboard this week:

The cheerful heart has a continual feast.

Proverbs 15:15

Happy Father's Day to My Most Incredible Father!

2011-06-19T10:22:00.001-04:00

Parenthood has given me a completely different perspective on the time, attention and sacrifice my parents exhibited for so many years, and continue to even now.

I look at pictures like these differently. We look like we're happily floating along, relaxing and enjoying the water.

But I now know that relaxation is almost impossible while holding a baby. In reality was there fussing and squirming?

Even if there was he would have likely kept that smile and tried to make it an enjoyable experience for me.
My entire life, I've rarely experienced impatience from my Dad.

He's always made us feel that spending time with us is his highest preference and choice and there's nowhere else he'd rather be.

I've read countless times that children's feeling of being loved is heavily measured by time. Daddy (as I still call him) has always made time with us a major priority.

He's always been at our hundreds of events and games, taken us on dates, pulled out the family devotion book every night when dinner was done, created weekly fun Sunday afternoon family excursions, planned amazing trips and vacations, upheld family traditions like our weekly family viewing of Touched by an Angel while eating Rice a Roni, and lead our monthly 'family meetings' where we ate candy cigarettes and drank root beer out of bottles (still makes me laugh to think of that)!

And probably the most valuable time he gave was every single night kneeling beside our beds, talking about our days and praying with us. What a gift he gave and what a legacy he has left!

Happy Father's Day, Daddy! I love you so much and hope that I can demonstrate to my own children my love for them in the time I give joyfully, as you have.

Happy Birthday My Love!

2011-06-18T14:45:00.000-04:00

Since his last birthday a year ago, a lot has happened in Kristian's life.

He's bravely led his family in a cross-country move to pursue what we have believed to be the Lord's leading in legal education. By what he humbly calls only God's grace, he's done well and successfully completed his first year.

But regardless of his performance, I'd be immensely proud.

In my mind, his biggest accomplishments of the past year include

time spent with his son like the hours tickling and wrestling,

and the nightly bedtime story readings followed by rocking and singing him to sleep.

And it would include his diligence in initiating nightly scripture reading and prayer as he and I
get into bed each night, both so tired these days,

and showing way too much kindness over every meal I make
(usually declaring it's the best ___ he's ever had!).

What matters this past year is the way he's sought to know the Lord in deeper ways
and offered encouragement and advice from that place of understanding,
and continued to exhibit what I consider to be an inspiring blend of
humility, intentionality, and boldness in his love for others.

He continues to encourage and challenge me.
I love him more as every year passes.

Happy Birthday to my most wonderful husband, Kristian Rose.

Overwhelming Wonder

2011-06-12T22:45:00.001-04:00

photos by Anne

Summer Vacation!

2011-06-08T22:35:00.000-04:00

We had one week in between Kristian's finals ending and his summer job beginning, and one chance to get away before our family of three becomes four! So we headed up to the Ozarks.

It was such a fantastic time and I'm so thankful for these memories. Kristian and I quickly realized that vacations now look quite different than vacations of the past. Any hopes of relaxation have been replaced with the new reality of excitement and non-stop fun and adventure :) (and chaos management!)

One of the trip's highlights for Caed: Feeding fish and turtles!

This place was just gorgeous.

Whenever we travel I keep a little journal of the daily happenings, a tradition my dad forced us to start on vacations when we were younger, and I am incredibly thankful.

Just a couple weeks ago I was looking back in journals from about 10 years ago and re-living some moments from our family trip to Ecuador. I laughed till I cried at some of the things I recorded! Those journals are invaluable to me.

Here are a few top favorites from this trip's journal:
-Family trip to Target to stock up on road trip snacks
-Family paddle boat ride with Caed sitting in between us steering
-Watching Kung Fu Panda with Kristian on our laptop with earphones one night while Caed slept (we had to get creative on what to do after 7:30pm when he went to sleep... and we were all in one room.)
-Out-of-this-world waffles with berries and whipped cream
-Time spent sitting on the balcony of our room with Kristian while Caedmon slept
-The incredible massage Kristian surprised me with for Mother's Day at the spa where we were staying.
- A dinner with Kristian the last night with the most breathtaking mountain view. One of my favorite things in life: just sitting and talking with him.

The Answer Every Time

2011-06-06T22:44:00.000-04:00

The other day was a particularly rough one.

We'd just gotten back from our little family vacation (which was so wonderful) and there were piles of dirty laundry and no groceries and a baby who had been off his normal schedule for a week and was testing all the boundaries and throwing major tantrums when he didn't get his way.

At one point, so flustered, I stepped away for a moment into our room to try and regroup while Kristian fed Caedmon.

I sat on our bed, opening my bible randomly, and read Psalm 31. The last line I was left with before I walked back into what felt like chaos was

The Lord preserves the faithful...
Be strong and let your heart take courage,
all you who wait for the Lord.

Honestly, I didn't feel instantaneously better, but I kept repeating these words in my mind as I fed Caed the rest of his lunch, trying my hardest to keep a smile on my face and a loving attitude, trusting that I would understand God's peace more eventually... or at least hoping so.

Then Caedmon's little food-covered hand pointed up at the sign that hangs on the wall right above his chair, that one I made a while back that reads, "give thanks."

He does this pretty frequently during meals and likes us to read it and he mimics our tones with his own version. Usually it will happen once or twice a day. This time he kept pointing to it over and over again and wanted me to keep saying it.

So there I sat saying "Give thanks, give thanks, give thanks" somewhat absently-mindedly, until it finally hit me.

Ah, yes.
Give thanks.
I know this.
I've learned this well the last several months, yet I still so often forget the thing that brings such joy.

Reflecting on thanks changes everything, and most importantly it takes our focus off ourselves and turns it to the Lord. It's worship.

The rest of the day was not perfect, but the posture of my heart was dramatically different. When the gifts and the Giver are the focus, patience and love seem to flow a lot more easily.

So thankful for His gracious reminders.

We're So Close Thanks To You! (and there's a giveaway!)

2011-06-05T19:44:00.000-04:00

Friends, you have been amazing in helping us almost reach our goal to raise money for one heart surgery through the Preemptive Love Coalition!

Only a few more dollars to go and then THREE heart surgeries will be given to the families of THREE babies who desperately need them.

There's still time to order stationary through the Etsy shop, or you can go straight to our information/ donation page.

All donors and stationary purchasers will have their names entered in a little giveaway in a couple weeks (details to come).

The more sets of stationary sets you order, the more times your name is entered!

Thank you so much for your kind and generous support.

You have encouraged us greatly.

Just a reminder, sets are $10 a piece and include 6 handmade cards and 6 envelopes.

Summer Wreath

2011-06-03T14:35:00.000-04:00

2011 Wreath Challenge

Spend $0 (use all materials I already have in the house)

Spend less than 30 minutes

Create a cheery little greeting at our front door for each season

Simple Summer Wreath

Yellow and gray paper scraps, twine, mini clothespins

Photo Shoot!

2011-05-16T22:50:00.000-04:00

My wonderful and talented friend, Nicole, needed a little model for a project she's working on. We were happy to oblige!

I love how she captured our very active and happy boy. I think the fact that he absolutely loves her helped out.

Check out her excellent work at Nicole Hager Photography!

Thank you, Nicole!!

Still Reigning

2011-05-11T21:01:00.000-04:00

This article was heartbreaking to read, but is a necessary reminder of God's sovereignty in extremely difficult situations. I'm inspired by people like this who remind me of that.

Notes in Boxes

2011-05-09T11:01:00.000-04:00

We were able to make a quick last-minute trip down to Dallas this weekend to celebrate Mother's Day. Very thankful to be close enough for trips like this. And very thankful for my mama.

She's made years of sacrifices and selfless decisions, and she has always prayed for us.

I was going through some of my old boxes in my parents' garage this weekend and found many notes and scraps of paper with my mom's handwriting-- years for verses and prayers she had written for me for a tryout of some sort or a test or a birthday or slipped in a lunch box.

I do hope I can continue that priceless legacy.

Little Pieces of Life

2011-05-06T10:30:00.001-04:00

Caedmon and I are staying busy while Kristian studies hard core for finals. He's doing such a great job. I'm not sure how he does it. My mind would have definitely exploded by now.

Apparently last weekend was festival weekend in our town. They were happening everywhere! After dropping Kristian off at the school on Saturday, Caed and I met friends over on Main street to watch a parade. I think it was Caedmon's first and he was enthralled. Loved watching his face.

I also thoroughly enjoyed the contrast between this small town parade, and the NYC Macy's Day parades we attended for several years.

This one mainly consisted of John Deere tractors, firetrucks and police cars with their lights flashing, Jr. High bands, a few horse-drawn wagons, and was topped off with the local Teacher-of-the-Year nominees riding in the back of a convertible. Love it.

Caedmon thought it was pretty cool to stand in the back of our friend's pick-up to enjoy the show.

.................

Staying on top of the stationary sales has been keeping me pretty busy in the evenings, and I'm so thankful! I can't thank all of you enough who have bought cards to support the heart surgery through PLC. In a matter of weeks YOU have helped us raise almost enough for the surgery (meaning THREE surgeries!)

I can't express how grateful we are and what a joy it's been to see so many friends and family members (and a few strangers!) contribute to this. Thank you so very much.

.............................

And lastly, how could I not mention it.... the Royal Wedding!

via

I don't read People magazine or follow celebrity news closely so I didn't know a whole lot about the wedding leading up to the day. But I was excited to bring it up online and watch while Caed and I played in the living room during the day Friday. (And later I may have watched some of it twice.)

Just gorgeous!

I even got teary at one point when Kate and her father were riding through the streets of London on the way to the Abbey and the whole city was lined up waving and cheering. It was amazing. And as their car drew closer to the church, life as she'd known it was quickly drawing to a close. There was so much happening in those moments.

I loved the fact that an entire city (and really much of the world) would pause for a day in celebration. I think that's a beautiful thing.

I've always been fascinated by the British Monarchy and this of course added to my intrigue. So wonderful to watch this bit of history in the making.

A Kind Wife

2011-05-02T20:40:00.001-04:00

A couple days ago some kind ladies had me join in by writing Day Two of their forty-day Love Dare for wives. Thanks Lori and Teresa! Below is what I contributed.

When my husband and I were first married we moved away for about a year to a little island called Maui. Yes, it was dreamy in many ways and we look back on it fondly.

Though idyllic, it wasn't without its difficulties.

The difficulty came not from our lack of money, our roach-infested car, the very old and used mattress we slept on, or the fact that our grocery budget was so small that I pocketed hot dogs at a work lunch one day to add to a lentil soup at home that called for sausage links - which were definitely out of our price range. No, we look back at all those things and laugh and wonder at the simplicity of life then.

When I reflect on the difficulties of life in Maui, I think it can be summed up in a word: Expectations.

I was a twenty-one year old, one-month-married bride, having just moved out of the four-year dating (and engagement) relationship with the most romantic guy in the world. He constantly wooed me, pursued me, encouraged me, challenged me, and pretty much made me feel like the most beautiful girl who had ever existed.

My future was looking pretty good floating into marriage on that cloud of adoration.

It felt like my cloud was quickly dissipating a few months in because not all of my marital expectations were being met, and I was falling fast to the ground. I became a bit bitter, prideful, and sulky.

Now if you'd been observing our marriage from the outside you'd have been wondering what in the world I had to be sulking about (as was my husband, who was trying his hardest to love me well!). Kristian still treated me with respect and romance and kindness, and has always continued to 'pursue' me throughout our marriage.

But the transition from dating to marriage brought with it a few changes, and in my naivety I was not prepared! Where had the constant hand-holding and longing glances gone? Why wasn't I still being told multiple times throughout the day how wonderful I was? (I know, sounds awful!)

Basically, I was sitting around waiting to be adored (and consequently missing all the ways I was being loved) and I was totally neglecting to ask, "How am I loving him?"

The expectations I was placing on my husband were extremely difficult to live up to.

The theme for Day Two of The Love Dare is "Love is Kind."

The author of The Love Dare material broke Kindness down into four core components:

Gentleness

Helpfulness

Willingness

Initiative

My thoughts today are drawn to Initiative in regards to Kindness.

Kindness thinks ahead, then takes the first step. It doesn't sit around waiting to be prompted. The kind husband or wife will be the one who greets first, smiles first, serves first, and forgives first.

They don't require the other to get their act together before showing love.

When acting from kindness you see the need, then make your move. First. (excerpt from The Love Dare)

As my Hawaiian sob story tells, I was selfishly waiting to be showered with kindness and affection.
In my heart I was accusing my wonderful husband of not taking enough initiative to show kindness to me (at least in quantities I expected).

The difficult expectations I was placing on him left no room for kindness on my part!

I was slow to forgive because I thought he should have realized how he was hurting me.
I was slow to serve because I thought he should be serving me first.

Worst of all, I was seeking my worth and validation in the gift God had given me, not in God himself who is the only One able to fill those needs.

In His extreme grace and kindness, God has taught me much in the six years since about love (though I've still got a long way to go!).

The story of the Good Samaritan in Luke displays such a beautiful example of Initiative wrapped up in kindness and love. One man goes out of his way to stop and help another (and he was even from a clashing race). He goes so far as to take him to shelter, and pay for his lodging and care.

He has taught me that my heart should reflect that of the Good Samaritan's.
He's teaching me to forget about my own agenda and go out of my way to love others. Most specifically, my husband.

I long to be a kind wife who speaks gentle and encouraging words, who is willing to serve first, who takes initiative when there's a need.

I long for my husband to feel the kindness of his Savior by the way I take the initiative to show kindness to him.

If you're up for the challenge, join me in today's dare:
In addition to saying nothing negative to your spouse again today, do at least one unexpected gesture as an act of kindness.
What discoveries did you make about love? What specifically did you do in this dare? How did you show kindness?

Celebrating a most excellent sister

2011-05-01T22:35:00.000-04:00

Today we celebrate the birthday of my beautiful sister, Anne.

I'm told that when she was born, I (just over a year and a half old) would pet her head and say "Nice, nice."

And I still feel the same today.

If you've read my blog for any length of time you know how much I love my sisters. They are incredible and I'm so blessed to have two best friends for life.

I couldn't imagine a more uplifting and encouraging sister than Anne. She shows genuine happiness for me and has in every stage of life. She's unbelievably supportive.

She's humble and seeks counsel from others.

She loves Kristian like her own brother, and loves her nephew with a passion, which is such gift to me.

She's a blast. We've always enjoyed the same types of things and so love doing just about anything together, especially if it includes sitting still and drinking coffee.

Anne's adventuresome and has been majorly stretched over the last few years through her time in YWAM. She's on a fantastic West Coast journey right now, touring with her group to distribute a book they wrote and a message-- lessons they learned and inspirations from their world travels over the past two years. You should really follow along!

I keep thinking of more and more things I want to say about Sister, but I want to get this post up before I go to bed, so in closing I say Happy Birthday to a better sister than I could ever dream of or hope for. You are a true gift in my life for which I'm exceedingly grateful.

Thank you for being who you are. All three of us love you so very much.